There's Something You Should Know

There's something you should know,

about how I feel and what I see,

Why I'm so in love with you,

and I hope you can see,

Each time I say she's beautiful,

she refuses to accept it,

I say she's amazing,

she turns away,

Each time I say she'e wonderful,

she gives a heavy sigh,

If I didn't mean them,

I wouldn't say them,

believe me, this is no lie,

This is what I mean,

The way she smiles,

when she looks at me,

and holds me in her arms,

The way she talks to me,

and kisses my lips,

The conversations we have,

she puts a smile on my face,

Each time we talk,

makes my heart race,

The way she makes me feel,

it's a complete and utter love,

something that feels unreal,

She's beautiful, 

amazing and wonderful,

She's everything to me,

Now do you understand,

Now do you see,

Why I feel like this?

and you are with me. 

To my Darling Wendy,

I Love You!

xoxo

Copyright © 2011 John Bevan

I Miss You So Much

I miss my baby so much,
I miss her kiss, her smile, her touch,
her smell, her laugh, her warm embrace,
I'll never forget,
how she makes me feel,
When she's in my arms,
I'm in a peaceful place,
The gentle kiss of her lips,
the touch of her face,
Her eyes are filled with love,


But now I sit here on my own,
and think of her,
How much I wish I was there,
by her side, 
I know it's a few month away,
but a day away is to long,
The pain that I feel inside,
is something that I try so hard to hide,
To be without her,
 is like the sun never rising,


Maybe I'm wrong putting this down,
giving my heart,
Longing to be with the one you love,
believing that she is your world,
You'd move heaven and earth for,
Dreaming of the future,
the things we'd do,
Wanting just to be with you,


To travel the world,
visit new places,
Create new dreams,
and making them real,
To plan our lives, say our marriage vows, 
I'll love you forever till the day I die,
I am your King, and you my Queen,
Direct descendant or at least it seems.


Forever Yours,


John 








Copyright © 2011 John Bevan

For You!

I'd fall on Excalibur for you,
Slay the dragons and demons to,
I'd ride a million miles,
just to be with you,
Because my heart,
 forever belongs to you,
There's nothing that I wouldn't do,
Just to be where you are,
To walk with you,


Hand in hand underneath the stars,
To be with you when it rains,
and kiss your lips to ease the pain,
I hold you in my gentle arms,
and feel your heart beating,
Beating from your chest,
When I kiss your lips,
I feel a tenderness, 


Your smiles so sweet,
it gives a warm glow,
You know how much I love you so,
If you wanted the stars,
I'd bring them to you,
or swim the oceans,
Do something new,
Write a story for me and you,


I'd do anything,
Just to be with you,
A vision of hopes and dreams,
We'd work on it and make it real,
stamp on it and make the seal,
Our hopes and dreams will come true,
because I believe in me and you.


Forever Your's


John    






Copyright © 2011 John Bevan

Menancholy Feelings

Why is it that life is so difficult? I feel in love with someone who lives in another country the problem is it's going to cost around 3 grand to be with her. And each month we're away from each other is driving me insane. We're both in jobs we don't like and don't pay enough, she's being hounded by men on the internet whilst I just sit here and try to be patient. But get left hanging in front of the computer for hours waiting when she says I'll call you back.
My fiancée's due to come over to England in the next couple of days and I can't wait. She's never been outside of her country before so this will be a whole new experience for her. My only concern is that during the time I was waiting to go to see her, in her country. I was more concerned in meeting her than actually going to see the country. I don't know maybe it's just the excitement of coming to the country, that brought Dr Who in to her life or British movies.
How do people manage to smother there partners when they don't see them and get to talk to them for an hour or two apart from the weekends? They used to talk for hours on end about anything and everything but as time goes by the talking becomes less and less.




Copyright © 2011 John Bevan

Cheats

I would have posted this comment but as you know it won't allow me to.

The sky is blue and the sun is shining, anyway back to the post.

The trick is to look forward and not dwell on the past. You should know this you've told me often enough lol.

If someone cheats on you during a relationship it's best to go separate ways. 

The reason is that if you forgive them you are giving the ok for them to do it again.

Believe me I know, and I dare say you do as well deep down.

Although we think things will be ok they very rarely are and you end up feeling more hurt and betrayed.

Heaven knows it's hard to pick up the pieces and move on but the way to look at it is there are better things ahead.

Not all men and women are bastards or bitches eventually you find the right one. As for culture reasons, the words bollocks spring to mind.

It's a choice either stick with the person you're in love with or get out of the relationship.

And although at first it does hurt and you feel like your world is caving in.

You eventually realize that it wasn't meant to be and move on.

Our case in point, we've both had iffy relationships throughout our lives.

But I can honestly say I've never felt more alive being with you, than with any of the women I've been with.

Even though we are at present miles apart I love you completely. 

And I know you feel the same way. 

We have a long journey to go, but knowing that you love me and we'll be together soon pulls me through.

Thinking of the good times we've had and the ones we are yet to have. These are the things that should be focused on.

Your friend should focus on these things as well. Although her relationship is over she has a lot to look forward to.

College/Universities new people, new start in life and experiences similar interests, all of these will help with rebuilding her life.

Copyright © 2011 John Bevan

Unconditional

 I never found it easy to talk to girls when I was younger. I was always the quiet one, and if ever I did ask someone out I was mostly knocked back. Forever the nice guy who never gets the girl especially when I was at school. At that point I could count the amount of girls I'd been out with on one hand. Then adolescence at the age of seventeen I went out with someone for 11months. When we broke up it was the worst time of my life and I mean worst. I'd recently been made redundant and my girlfriend had split up with me. I ended up in the back garden tears rolling down my eyes thinking of ending everything. Thankfully! I didn't go through with it but I swore I would never cheat on someone I loved again.

  I'm thirty nine now and my heart has been broken so many times I daren't mention.  Well I say so many times, I can count how many relationships I've been in on two hands. Why is it when you've had your heart broken you tend to put up barriers, obstacles, defense systems in fear of it happening again but in doing that there's a tendency to push the one you love away. I know this because I've done it myself when I was seventeen. I was afraid of letting her in and in the end, I ended up hurting both of us.

 Now when I go in to a relationship it's with my heart held out. Most of the time it's been tore up, spat out and bruised never held gently caressed or cared for. Everything is given, No if, buts or maybes just everything I have, life is to short to not fall in love with someone who feels the same way, has the same interests, who wants what you want, and wants to enjoy lives experiences with you, this is someone you'll enjoy life with continuously until the end. Keep hold of them and never let them go and you'll both enjoy the life you live. Don't ever throw that away because the rewards are immense.

Love you Wendy




Copyright © 2011 John Bevan

Dreams

After saying good night to my darling Wendy, at 0338 in the morning. I had the most horrific nightmare and woke up about three times before I finally managed to nod off. Anyway the dream was about an isolated country home not sure of the location but lets face it, it's a dream and most things are vague. There were two young lads(boys) living in this house. I have an idea it was a holiday home  for weekend couples because of the setting and the way the rooms were laid out. As I was walking through the house I noticed it was quiet, you could hear a pin drop. Some of the walls had blood running down them . As I was walking down this one corridor I noticed one of the lads, just standing in the doorway. He had a kitchen knife in his hand, Blood running down the blade and his face had an evil look. at that point I decided to run. No surprise there, but don't forget there were two of them and I had no idea where he was. So the chase began and in the process stepping over the dead bodies that lay on the floor. Both of the boys were chasing me, at some point we ended up outside. I ran for some nearby woods. What an excellent idea, Not! Because now, I was unable to see them coming. I don't think I made it because the lads were still chasing me when I woke up. 
Thankfully I hate having dreams like these, it's rare for me to have dreams/nightmares these day and then remember them. I even scared myself when I woke up because it had only been an hour before I'd said goodnight to my fiancée. So you can imagine how dark it was  and I'll defy any one who said they weren't afraid of the dark when they were little children.
 When I was a child my imagination got the best of me, mind you my sister and I feared the same thing when we were living in a house in Maypole. It got to a point where I used to sleep under the blankets near the bottom of the bed. I also resorted to hiding in a little cupboard that was just above a fitted wardrobe. you know the one you put blankets and linen in. 


Oh well hopefully the next dream I have will be a good one, and one I can remember to let you know about. So long for now and don't forget it's just a nightmare.  :)





Copyright © 2011 John Bevan